Constellation work brings us into a new relationship with our bodies allowing us to release the unconscious trauma and stresses we hold for our family system. These stresses can show up in our work and our day-to-day relationships as well as our health, finances and ability to succeed.

Working together in a group we use exercises to create a living map of our issues. This helps us to see things from a wider perspective, including the systems we are born into and are a part of. This new perspective helps to free up the blocks in our lives.

Family Constellations is an embodiment practice, it takes courage, the desire to show up and a willingness to allow the body to take the lead and express itself through movement and representation. You are not required to deeply analyse things or even talk much at all, beyond describing your issue and some of your ancestral history if you know it.

In a constellations group, you have the opportunity to look at your own issues specifically, but also to experience being a representative or a member of the holding circle can be a profoundly healing experience.

How does Healing happen in a Family Constellations session?

Bert Hellinger introduced the Orders of Love. The Orders are:

a) Everyone in a family system belongs in the family system. So people who are excluded need to be brought back into the system. We do this using representatives and Healing Sentences that acknowledge the missing person. Example of excluded people are children who died young or were given away, extra marital affairs (secret) , victims and perpetrators, sometimes previous partners or miscarried or aborted children, anyone who died in tragic circumstances and more.

b) Everyone in a family system has a place in a particular order in the system. So for example, the first child is the first and has a particular place and weight in the order, the subsequent children come after and so on. Again using positioning of representatives and healing sentences we can bring order back to the system.

c) The Balance of Giving and Taking - parents give and children receive. It cannot be the other way round as ultmately parents give the greatest gift which is life. In other relationships there is a balance - for example in a romantic relatinship if you give me something it’s a good idea for me to give a little more (this is not referring necessarily to material gifts but gifts of love.) This way love can grow in the relationship. Also if you hurt me I need to hurt you back, but a little less, this gives space for the hurt to diminish and the love to grow again.

The best way to see how this happens is to attend a session in person and see for yourself!

Listen to the podcast Naphia and I did with Lisa Strbac to learn more about Family Constellations.